Rick Thorris revved his Harley. "Hey hotpants. Wanna take a spin?"
"Rick, you dog, you don't remember me, do you?" I said, easing into the drawl of my past.
He squinted at me. Not a clue. Not a darn clue. Typical.
"Cindy," I prompted him.
"Riiiiggghhtttt," he said. Clearly, he didn't remember me.
"I used to change your diaper when I was eleven. I lived down the street from you."
He cleared his throat.
I went on, "I remember thinking, my heck what are his parents feeding him? We're talking nuclear waste toxic."
A few of his friends outside started laughing at his discomfort.
"Then, there was the fact that you got gas from everything no matter what I fed you. Geez... even water. I used to double up on your diapers just to try to keep it in."
"Okay, Cindy, it was really...."
"Then, you got older... and you were a pill. You used to throw the biggest tantrums if I didn't let you sleep with that stuffed rabbit of yours. What was his name?" I was nearly being drowned out by the laughing at this point.
Rick revved his Harley again and took off.
"OH YEAH! FLUFFYKINS!" I yelled at his back as he took off. Several of Rick's friends were clutching their stomachs from laughing so hard.
"Who was that, Jess?" Laura asked, walking out of the bar.
"This guy that once stood me up for a date in high school," I said, dropping the accent. "Did you find out where the rehearsal dinner is?"
She nodded.
"Okay, cool, maybe this trip back won't be so bad after all."
Rick Thorris revved his Harley. "Hey hotpants. Wanna take a spin?"
"Hotpants?" I spat my coffee out, gagging on the disgusting taste of Rick Thorris's so-called 'game.'"Buzz of, Rick."
"Come on, Jane..." I cut him off before he could attempt to convince me to hop on that wretched motorcycle.
"You seem to have forgotten, Rick, that despite my 'hotpants' my brain actually functions for more than just regulating my breathing. Unlike the girls you usually date."
"Ouch." He feigned, grabbing his wannabe Hugh Heffner heart.
"I'm serious, Rick. Give it up. This little dance it getting tired." I started walking back down the street. School was only a few blocks from out Park Slope apartment and I was in no mood to fight off Rick's unwarranted advances today. I was freezing outside and I just wanted to get to school as quickly as possible.
"Have it your way, Janey, but one day you'll say yes."
"Fat chance." I mumbled as Rick pulled away from the curb.
Senior year, I told myself. Six more months and I would be free of these idiots. I know you'd think because I live in New York City, I would never feel trapped, right? Wrong. I've lived here my whole life and when you live ANYWHERE your whole life, eventually it starts to get old. Even NYC.
I pulled my coat tighter around my shoulders as winter's vicious chill whipped around the city buildings.
"Hey." I heard someone call, the sounds of running footsteps echoing behind me. I looked over my shoulder. Joseph.
I smiled without thinking. "Hey." Joseph was a year younger than me and moved to my block a few years ago. He wore black plastic frame glasses and had a pension for ironic t-shirts. Today he was bundled up in his ski coat, jeans, and worn black converse.
"Was the Thorris harrassing you?" He asked, a laugh pulling at the corner of his mouth.
"Ugh. Yes," I grumbled.
"That guy just won't give up will he?"
"Unfortunately, no."
"One day you should say yes, just to see what he does."
"No way." I cringed. Why was Joseph suggesting I go out with the world's creepiest neanderthal?
His blue eyes flashed in the morning light. "I'm kidding, Jane. That guy's an idiot."
I sighed in relief. I thought Joseph and I had an understanding. Brooklyn was amazing, but we were bigger than the kids who went to our school. Jospeh wanted to go to California for art school and I wanted to go for the beaches-- I'm sure I'd figure out what I wanted to do once I got there, right?
"Ahheemm." Joseph cleared is throat.
"Yeah?"
"So are you just turning down Rick cause he's an idiot or is this a sort of no-dating thing you've got going on?" My heart fluttered a bit.
"Just Rick, why?" I asked.
"Well, I was thinking maybe we could do something this weekend... if you wanted, that is."
Rick Thorris revved his Harley. "Hey hotpants. Wanna take a spin?"
ReplyDelete"Rick, you dog, you don't remember me, do you?" I said, easing into the drawl of my past.
He squinted at me. Not a clue. Not a darn clue. Typical.
"Cindy," I prompted him.
"Riiiiggghhtttt," he said. Clearly, he didn't remember me.
"I used to change your diaper when I was eleven. I lived down the street from you."
He cleared his throat.
I went on, "I remember thinking, my heck what are his parents feeding him? We're talking nuclear waste toxic."
A few of his friends outside started laughing at his discomfort.
"Then, there was the fact that you got gas from everything no matter what I fed you. Geez... even water. I used to double up on your diapers just to try to keep it in."
"Okay, Cindy, it was really...."
"Then, you got older... and you were a pill. You used to throw the biggest tantrums if I didn't let you sleep with that stuffed rabbit of yours. What was his name?" I was nearly being drowned out by the laughing at this point.
Rick revved his Harley again and took off.
"OH YEAH! FLUFFYKINS!" I yelled at his back as he took off. Several of Rick's friends were clutching their stomachs from laughing so hard.
"Who was that, Jess?" Laura asked, walking out of the bar.
"This guy that once stood me up for a date in high school," I said, dropping the accent. "Did you find out where the rehearsal dinner is?"
She nodded.
"Okay, cool, maybe this trip back won't be so bad after all."
Rick Thorris revved his Harley. "Hey hotpants. Wanna take a spin?"
ReplyDelete"Aw, c'mon," said Davis. "Rick, we done been over this."
Rick shrugged. "Ya'll keep tryin' it on the ladies. Figure it can't hurt to keep ma hopes up. 'Sides, them leather pants just drive me wild."
Davis flushed. "Mebbe just a short ride, then."
Rick Thorris revved his Harley. "Hey hotpants. Wanna take a spin?"
ReplyDelete"Hotpants?" I spat my coffee out, gagging on the disgusting taste of Rick Thorris's so-called 'game.'"Buzz of, Rick."
"Come on, Jane..." I cut him off before he could attempt to convince me to hop on that wretched motorcycle.
"You seem to have forgotten, Rick, that despite my 'hotpants' my brain actually functions for more than just regulating my breathing. Unlike the girls you usually date."
"Ouch." He feigned, grabbing his wannabe Hugh Heffner heart.
"I'm serious, Rick. Give it up. This little dance it getting tired." I started walking back down the street. School was only a few blocks from out Park Slope apartment and I was in no mood to fight off Rick's unwarranted advances today. I was freezing outside and I just wanted to get to school as quickly as possible.
"Have it your way, Janey, but one day you'll say yes."
"Fat chance." I mumbled as Rick pulled away from the curb.
Senior year, I told myself. Six more months and I would be free of these idiots. I know you'd think because I live in New York City, I would never feel trapped, right? Wrong. I've lived here my whole life and when you live ANYWHERE your whole life, eventually it starts to get old. Even NYC.
I pulled my coat tighter around my shoulders as winter's vicious chill whipped around the city buildings.
"Hey." I heard someone call, the sounds of running footsteps echoing behind me. I looked over my shoulder. Joseph.
I smiled without thinking. "Hey." Joseph was a year younger than me and moved to my block a few years ago. He wore black plastic frame glasses and had a pension for ironic t-shirts. Today he was bundled up in his ski coat, jeans, and worn black converse.
"Was the Thorris harrassing you?" He asked, a laugh pulling at the corner of his mouth.
"Ugh. Yes," I grumbled.
"That guy just won't give up will he?"
"Unfortunately, no."
"One day you should say yes, just to see what he does."
"No way." I cringed. Why was Joseph suggesting I go out with the world's creepiest neanderthal?
His blue eyes flashed in the morning light. "I'm kidding, Jane. That guy's an idiot."
I sighed in relief. I thought Joseph and I had an understanding. Brooklyn was amazing, but we were bigger than the kids who went to our school. Jospeh wanted to go to California for art school and I wanted to go for the beaches-- I'm sure I'd figure out what I wanted to do once I got there, right?
"Ahheemm." Joseph cleared is throat.
"Yeah?"
"So are you just turning down Rick cause he's an idiot or is this a sort of no-dating thing you've got going on?" My heart fluttered a bit.
"Just Rick, why?" I asked.
"Well, I was thinking maybe we could do something this weekend... if you wanted, that is."
"Sure." I smiled.
Man! These are ALL so gooooood!! You guys rock! "Gotta get back in the game," she said.
ReplyDelete